Shir Ha-Ma'alot #22
"And may we find favor and good understanding in the eyes of God and man."
Both of them are needed. "This without that is not sufficient" (Niddah 70b). On the one hand, if a person only tries to find favor in the eyes of people, in a superficial, sociable manner, and he forgets the absolute Divine truth, in the end his life will be devoid of true content. On the other hand, if he only operates based on what he believes to be the opinion of Hashem, but people do not approve of him, this is also a bad sign, because he does not know how to point the way to the truth. Obviously what is explicit in Halachah does not require the approval of people. But for a person who chooses a path for himself to follow in life, it is incumbent upon him to be extremely particular that people do not speak ill of him. Our Sages say that if a "Ben Torah" (a Jew who lives according to the dictates of the Torah) does not speak pleasantly and does not conduct business honestly, people say about him: "Woe to him who learned Torah. Woe to his father who taught him Torah. This man who learned Torah, look how corrupt are his deeds and how ugly his ways" – This is the definition of desecrating God’s Name. But if he speaks pleasantly with people and conducts business honestly, people say about him: "Fortunate is his father who taught him Torah. Fortunate is his teacher who taught him Torah. Woe to people who have not learned Torah. This man learned Torah, look how fine are his deeds and how proper his ways" - This is the definition of sanctifying God’s Name (Yoma 86a).
Both of them are needed. "This without that is not sufficient" (Niddah 70b). On the one hand, if a person only tries to find favor in the eyes of people, in a superficial, sociable manner, and he forgets the absolute Divine truth, in the end his life will be devoid of true content. On the other hand, if he only operates based on what he believes to be the opinion of Hashem, but people do not approve of him, this is also a bad sign, because he does not know how to point the way to the truth. Obviously what is explicit in Halachah does not require the approval of people. But for a person who chooses a path for himself to follow in life, it is incumbent upon him to be extremely particular that people do not speak ill of him. Our Sages say that if a "Ben Torah" (a Jew who lives according to the dictates of the Torah) does not speak pleasantly and does not conduct business honestly, people say about him: "Woe to him who learned Torah. Woe to his father who taught him Torah. This man who learned Torah, look how corrupt are his deeds and how ugly his ways" – This is the definition of desecrating God’s Name. But if he speaks pleasantly with people and conducts business honestly, people say about him: "Fortunate is his father who taught him Torah. Fortunate is his teacher who taught him Torah. Woe to people who have not learned Torah. This man learned Torah, look how fine are his deeds and how proper his ways" - This is the definition of sanctifying God’s Name (Yoma 86a).
Originally posted by Torat HaRav Aviner
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